Mom Writes First

23: Write More by Choosing Better Thoughts with the Thought Bridge

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Harness the power of your thoughts to achieve your writing goals!
You can write more by choosing better thoughts, and this episode shares a tool, called the Thought Bridge, to help you do just that! 

Learn how to shift  beliefs about time management to help you reach your writing goals. 

Learn  the Thought Bridge tool, and understand how it is based on cognitive behavioral theory

The episode encourages listeners to examine their thoughts, recognize beliefs that do not serve them, and gradually shift towards more supportive thoughts using the Thought Bridge. 

00:00 Introduction to Time Management and the Thought Bridge
00:55 Welcome to Mom Writes First Podcast
01:56 Shifting Beliefs to Serve Your Goals
02:23 The Power of Thought in Achieving Goals
03:39 A Personal Journey: From Time Scarcity to Abundance
07:19 Implementing the Thought Bridge Technique
10:26 Building Your Personal Thought Bridge
16:26 Empowering Your Writing Journey
17:09 Closing Thoughts and Invitations

Take the QUIZ to discover your writing style, and get tips on how to leverage it to write more!

Ready to take back your time and add hours to the day so you can finally manage it all? Then you have to check out the FREE Time Audit Guide. You'll get coaching, worksheets, and tips on running your first time audit so that you can finally write your book without burning out. It's absolutely free, and it's my way of supporting and empowering YOU!

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Copyright 2024, Mom First Coaching

23: Write More by Choosing Better Thoughts with the Thought Bridge

[00:00:00] 

[00:00:00] Introduction to Time Management and the Thought Bridge

[00:00:00] Jen: today's episode is all about shifting our beliefs, specifically our beliefs around time and how we can use a tool called the thought bridge to help us get there. If you are working on trying to figure out how you can add more time to your day so that you can write, I want to invite you. To get my free resource. 

[00:00:22] It's 50 pages long, and it will guide you on a 21 day time audit so that you can figure out how you really are spending your time and recalibrate each week so that you can reach your goals. This is an absolutely free resource from me to you. 50 pages of coaching and guidance and templates and worksheets so that you can do a time audit. 

[00:00:47] That's really going to serve you. I hope you'll check it out. It's over, under free resources on my page, mom, first coaching.com. 

[00:00:55] Welcome to Mom Writes First Podcast

[00:00:55] Jen: Welcome to Mom Writes First, the [00:01:00] podcast that helps busy moms reach their writing goals. I'm Jen Larimore. I'm a mom of five, a lawyer turned life coach, And I'm writing my very first book. I want to help you reach your writing goals too. If you're a mom who wants to jumpstart her journey as a writer, then you have to head over to my website, momfirstcoaching.

[00:01:24] com, and take the free quiz there. That quiz is going to show you How to take your mom's superpower, you know, that characteristic that makes you an absolutely incredible mom to your kids, and then leverage that characteristic so that you can reach your writing goals. Again, the website is momfirstcoaching.

[00:01:47] com forward slash quiz. Now on to today's episode.

[00:01:54] Hey, my friends, it's Jen. 

[00:01:56] Shifting Beliefs to Serve Your Goals

[00:01:56] Jen: Today, I'm looking to teach you a concept that can help you to manage [00:02:00] your thoughts and really shift them, particularly shift your beliefs so that you can help. Yourself to choose thoughts and beliefs that are really, truly going to serve you and your goals. I'm all about practical tools here and about things that are going to help you reach your goal as a writer. 

[00:02:18] This is a tool that I just don't want you to miss out on. And it's called the thought bridge. 

[00:02:23] The Power of Thought in Achieving Goals

[00:02:23] Jen: What I teach and what I believe as a coach is that our thoughts. Create our feelings, which drive our behaviors, which ultimately get us our outcome or our results in life. This is super important from a coaching perspective, 

[00:02:39] What it really means is that our thoughts. Ultimately create the results that we have in our life. So your thought about what you can do as a writer and what you have time for writing as a mom and doing all the things that you do. Is ultimately what is going to determine whether or not you actually reach your goal of becoming a [00:03:00] writer. 

[00:03:00] So when we say our thoughts, create our feelings, which drive our behavior, which then gives us the outcomes or results in our life. 

[00:03:08] What we're really doing is relying on cognitive behavioral theory to explain what is happening in our lives and what's happening in the world overall. 

[00:03:18] what's important for you to realize here is that if your thoughts are creating your results, that is super good news because. You can control your thoughts. You can adjust them, you can become aware of them. You can choose thoughts and beliefs that are going to serve you. 

[00:03:34] So a belief is just a thought that you have thought a lot of times to the point that you don't question it. 

[00:03:39] A Personal Journey: From Time Scarcity to Abundance

[00:03:39] Jen: Let me give you an example of a belief that I thought was absolutely true for the longest time. So the belief I had for the longest time was that as a working mom of. A multitude of children. I only had time for two out of three things in my life. 

[00:03:55] So I had time to show up as a good mom. I had [00:04:00] time to show up as a good employee or I, a time to show up in a way that took care of myself and my own personal goals. Now I had time for two out of those three, I could make two out of three work. But not third. I used to call this the triangle of doom and that's what I would tell my friends, like back in the day before. I came across thought work and life coaching and started to realize just how bad that was for me and how bad it was for my goals. 

[00:04:28] And I would tell people this, like, it was true, like, oh, have you ever heard of the triangle of doom? You could only do two out of the three things. If you're a working mom, 

[00:04:36] you can be a good employee. You can be a good mom and you can have personal goals and take care of yourself, but you can only do two out of those three things. Not all of them, not just one of them, but you definitely do too, but you can't do all of them. I mean, this is just what I talk about it now. 

[00:04:52] It doesn't make any sense. It boggles my mind. But at the time it was so freakin [00:05:00] true to me. I said it was like, it was a fact and other working moms, my friends will look at me and be like, oh yeah, that totally resonates. Yeah. And of course it resonated with them because they were feeling like really busy. 

[00:05:13] And like there wasn't enough time either, because how often do we say that as moms? There's not enough time in the day. Right? Oh, here's the thing. 

[00:05:22] Uh, everything I was telling them. Was just a thought that I was thinking over and over and over again about how there's not enough time. 

[00:05:30] Now I know that there is plenty. Of time. And I believe that. Just as much as I ever believed any of those other thoughts I had about not having enough time. And I am objectively. 

[00:05:45] If I were to look at everything I have going on in my life. I am objectively doing many more things now and am responsible for much more now than I was back then. 

[00:05:57] And that truly my friends that surely is the [00:06:00] magic of thought work and life coaching and in particular mindset and transformative life coaching. What I believe in what I teach my clients is that the thoughts that we have are what really drive the results and outcomes in our life. The thoughts we have are just sentences in our brains and the beliefs that we have are just thoughts that we have thought a whole, whole bunch and don't question anymore. Often, we're not even aware of the beliefs and thoughts that are dictating the results in our life. 

[00:06:30] And we go through life on default with all these thoughts and beliefs swirling around in our life and in our head and giving us the same, same, same kind of life, same outcomes over and over and over again in your life. It's why it's sometimes takes like a very huge event. Or some big catalyst to actually get us to change and get different results. 

[00:06:52] If you are someone who has a writing goal that you've struggled to meet for a long time, this kind of coaching and work on your thoughts [00:07:00] and on your beliefs can really be incredibly impactful because here's the thing. 

[00:07:05] It doesn't have to be hard. You don't have to wait for some huge event or big catalyst in order to actually make a change. Instead, there are lots of coaching tools that can help us to get there right now. One of my very favorite most used coaching tools is a tool. 

[00:07:19] Implementing the Thought Bridge Technique

[00:07:19] Jen: I called the thought bridge. 

[00:07:20] One of the things that I want to have you do is choose thoughts that are going to serve you and your writing. 

[00:07:27] So you can ask yourself to test whether something is serving you is, is this thought useful to me? Stop asking yourself, whether I thought is good or bad and instead focus on. Hey, does this serve me? Is it useful to me? Is it helping me reach my goals? If it's not, then let it go. And here is how you let it go. 

[00:07:47] You use the thought bridge. The thought bridge. Is a tool that we use in coaching that helps us get from one thought that is not useful to a thought that is much more useful to us for where we [00:08:00] are currently in our journey. 

[00:08:02] It's a thought that's going to help us to reach our goals. Much more effectively and efficiently and quickly. One of the reasons I like the idea of a thought bridge is because it takes us from one spot. Where we have a thought that is not serving us and is not helpful to us for reaching our goals. Over to another spot where we have a thought that is helpful to us and is helping us reach our goals. I really loved the idea of thinking about this thought bridge. As a bridge that is crossing some water, some crossing, some time and space. Where there are all these like wooden slats on the bridge. 

[00:08:40] And each of those wooden slats represents a thought that is getting us a little bit closer to the thought that is most useful to us. So for me, a thought that I used to have, like I said, was, there was not enough time for me to do everything that I really wanted to do in life. That enough time for me to be a good employee, a good mom. And reach my personal [00:09:00] goals. But now after a lot of work and a lot of life experience, I'm at a thought. Where there is actually plenty of time. There is more than enough time for me to do everything I want to do. 

[00:09:15] Now do you think that I woke up one morning and was just like, oh, yesterday there wasn't enough time and no, I have like an abundance of time. There's plenty of time. No, of course not. That's not how it works. That's not how our brain works. 

[00:09:28] And in fact, if you had sat with me back then, and when I was believing that there wasn't enough time and couldn't possibly be enough time as if it were fact. And you had tried to tell me, oh, just try saying Jennifer, that you have all this time, that there's an abundance of time. If you would've told me that I would've been like, you know what? 

[00:09:46] Get outta here with all your Witchery and sorcery, there is no way that any of that is true. All right. Just stop with your lies. And that's because I wasn't in a space where I could possibly even be curious about [00:10:00] that or think that it potentially may be, might be true. The thought bridge is a tool that helps us get there gradually over time. 

[00:10:08] And it's very personal. And so it can be really helpful to think about it in terms of your own individual thought that you're having and where you want to get towards your goal is to give yourself time and space to come up with just that right next perfect individual thought for yourself. 

[00:10:26] Building Your Personal Thought Bridge

[00:10:26] Jen: So this is an approach that admittedly takes a little bit of time. 

[00:10:30] It takes some coaching. Whether it's self coaching or coaching with a professional like me. But it is individualized and it can really work wonders. 

[00:10:40] So here's how you do it. You need to figure out where you are when it comes to the specific topic that you're on. Say for instance, wanting to be a writer or wanting to spend more time writing. What I recommend is that you start with a mind dump, get all the thoughts out on paper and figure out what is happening in your mind. 

[00:10:59] If you [00:11:00] haven't already done. So listen to the episode immediately preceding this one, where I give you a journal prompt that can help guide you through working through some of these thoughts and identifying some of the thoughts and beliefs that might be. Limiting you or holding you back right now. 

[00:11:14] So once, you know what it is that you're believing right now about what it would mean to be a writer or how to become a writer or wanting to become a writer or wanting to reach your goals around writing. You have to think about what is on the other side of that bridge for you?

[00:11:29] so I shared with you, I wanted to get to a place where I believed that I had enough time. And then ultimately to a place where I believed I had more than enough time and that it didn't have to rush. I didn't have to push and I could just feel calm and good about where I was in the moment. 

[00:11:47] what you want to do is figure out where do you want to get to when it comes specifically to your beliefs about being a writer or reaching those writing goals of yours. And then. [00:12:00] Once you get that figured out, you start to look for some kind of like intermediate thoughts, some thoughts that are going to help you to build that bridge, to get to that new thought about who you want to be as a writer. 

[00:12:13] There's a lots of ways to go about this. 

[00:12:15] I can share with you though. What worked for me in terms of getting from the spot of there's not possibly enough time to, I have plenty of time. 

[00:12:26] The very first thought I used was maybe there are moms who feel like they. Have enough time. 

[00:12:34] And then whenever that thought about not having enough time will come up, I would do my best to interrupt that thought.

[00:12:41] And I would tell myself, maybe there are moms who feel like they're having enough time. And what happened then was the strangest most funniest thing is that. I would start finding people who seemed like they were not out of time all the time. I would find people who seemed [00:13:00] like they had more time. Then they knew what to do with, and gradually. I would start to believe that thought that maybe it is possible that there are women out there who are really amazing moms who are great employees, who are reaching their goals. 

[00:13:15] And don't feel like there is no way that there could not be enough time in this life. 

[00:13:21] And then from there, I started to think to myself, well, if there are people out there who feel like they have enough time, 

[00:13:31] Maybe there are some days where I could feel less rushed. Maybe there are some days where I could feel like there might be enough time and gradually from there, I just constantly. Built my belief looked for evidence to support it And constantly moved down towards the other end of the thought bridge, where I was at my goal. 

[00:13:51] Thought of believing that, Hey. There is enough time. And now I'm at a thought where I'm like, there is plenty of time, [00:14:00] not just enough, but plenty of time.

[00:14:03] And now I'm using this thought that there's plenty of time to actually help me to reach my writing goals. Because I used to have a thought that it wasn't even possible for me. To become the writer that I want to be here to do anything with writing while being a mom and while working, because there just wasn't enough time. 

[00:14:19] I used to have that belief, but now I know that that belief for me is not true. 

[00:14:24] And it doesn't have to be true for you either. 

[00:14:28] Like I said, this is a very individualized approach. You might find that you work on your thoughts and you're able to move very quickly towards your thought call. It may also take longer than you thought

[00:14:39] There are even times where you reach that goal thought really, really quickly. And it just changes very fast. Thing is, is that this work is transformative, but only if you do the work on it, only if you bring that awareness and practice thinking new thoughts. What I would encourage you today is just be curious and [00:15:00] open to the idea that maybe. Your beliefs could be different. 

[00:15:06] Maybe you could believe different things about what it would mean to become a writer and thereby let go. Of some of those thoughts that are already holding you back from reaching your true core. 

[00:15:17] When you do this work and stick with it, it truly is transformative. And I can't tell you how much peace I have gained by doing this work. And how much more. I have my own personal goals. I have been able to achieve because of it. And not only that, not only have I gotten to achieve my own personal goals, but I also got to set this really incredible example of a mom and employee and a woman who goes after her own personal goals. And I get to set that example for my kids. 

[00:15:47] And that means so freaking much to me. So freaking much to me. 

[00:15:52] So to sum up, you can use the thought bridge to change your thoughts or your beliefs on whatever topic you want, 

[00:15:58] Including those thoughts and [00:16:00] beliefs that are getting in the way of you really being the writer. You want to be really reaching those goals that you have for yourself. You can use it to go from one thought that is not serving you. To a goal thought that really truly will serve you. And you do this by picking thoughts one by one by one that maybe could be true for you. And that you then can use to get one step closer to your goal thought. That my friends is how you build a thought bridge. 

[00:16:26] Empowering Your Writing Journey

[00:16:26] Jen: If you ever want help applying the thought bridge or coming up with that next thought for yourself? Honestly, send me a message. I'm here to help you. I'm here to support you on this journey, 

[00:16:34] Truly it's up to each of us to empower each other on this journey. And it's my hope that by doing this work myself, and by sharing it with you and putting this podcast out into the world, it's my most sincere hope. That whether or not you ever hired me to coach you. That you get so much love and support from the work that I am doing and putting out and giving to you. 

[00:16:58] Absolutely for [00:17:00] free. 

[00:17:00] I want to empower you on this journey, because I know that if the world gets to see your book and see your work and it gets out in the world. I know that that's going to be better for all of us. 

[00:17:09] Closing Thoughts and Invitations

[00:17:09] Jen: Hey, it's Jen here. Listen, if this podcast resonates with you, then would you please do me a favor? Number one, share it with somebody else. It's up to each of us to empower each other on this journey, and that's one of the values that I am trying to Really hard to live into as part of this podcast. So please, if this podcast resonates with you, share it with a friend who it might help to number two, it would mean so much to me.

[00:17:40] If you would leave me a rating and review on Apple podcast or on Spotify, because that will help other people find this show to third. And finally, I want to invite you to get on board. Signed up for my absolutely free newsletter, not spam. It's not salesy. I just want to support you in [00:18:00] your writing goals.

[00:18:01] Head over to momfirstcoaching. com and you'll find a link there where you can easily sign up. Thank you so much for listening to this episode in case nobody has told you today, you are a beautiful, resourceful, whole, creative human being. You are not broken. You are an incredible writer. Keep on writing. I will see you next time.

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